In case you missed it here is eat mangos naked – part one.
The possibility of pure pleasure at giving and receiving. (Sark)
Personally, I only truly enjoy when I give and receive from the heart. If I am told to give due to obligation or social expectation, without regard for my preferences, finances, or feelings then it was resentful. These days I do not give unless it is from the heart.
The same goes for receiving. I do not want a gift because you feel you should give me anything. Nor do I want a gift if it is a financial burden. Knowing it is from the heart is just one part of me being comfortable receiving. If I find out it was a financial burden in any way I feel guilty. A gift should never negatively impact our finances or be an obligation.
The biggest and most important gift anyone can ever give me is their time and honesty. Only then can we have a meaningful relationship.
Form helping circles (Sark)
For decades we lived in communities, working together day in and day out, helping each other. At some point asking for help became a social taboo. The perception that you were weak if you wanted or needed help became the predominant mindset.
I love the idea of forming helping circles. I would love to have 2-4 people that I can call on qhen I simply cannot do it all myswlf. I also want to be someone thwy can call on when they need help. Would you like to be part of my helping circle? Who do you want to be in yours? Reach out and share this idea. The worse thing that can happen is they say no and you move on to another person. If someone says no, it is not personal!
Talk about giving and receiving with friends, and establish healthy boundaries.
This is something that I have done intermittenly and need to do more of. At this point in my life I do not have much in the way of extra funds. So, my focus is on making sure the kids have nice birthdays and holidays. But even then we do not over emphasize the material. Also, I know many in my life do not have much in the way of extra money. While gifts are lovely to receive, none of us really need a whole lot. In fact most of us could benefit from practicing simplification.
Tell the truth about what we are willing to give and receive. Update that list often. (Sark)
For me, I prefer company, adult conversation, honesty, a nice home cooked meal, good coffee with creamer, someone to dream with, playing in the dirt, walking in nature, willingness to embrace the loving chaos that small children bring, occassional babysitter, and when needed help with bigger projects. What do you prefer?
Become skilled at receiving (Sark)
Can you receive a gift with a simple thank you? How would you like your gifts to be received?
Become differently skilled at giving (Sark)
I love this. Rethink giving. I am a generous person who loves sharing and giving. When I had a high paying corporate job I did not have to think too much about this. Now, I have differwnt priorities. It has made me really look at what I need. This has made me aware that others may want to receive gifts that are not material.
What would you really love to receive? Make a list and share it with your friends and family. Tell them you would prefer this over the material. Be open and honest. Be true to yourself.