Personal boundaries are the hardest to not only learn but implement. When creating our personal boundaries we must remember to keep them fluid. Being fluid is important because it allows us to adapt to different people and situations while still maintaining our personal needs. The challenge lies in knowing how fluid to be in any given situation.
One of the key things for holding effective boundaries, is knowing what is yours and what is not. Other people’s emotional responses create a real challenge here. On one hand, the person who is made responsible for how others feel can be subject to control and abuse, on the other, the person who pays no regard to their impact will likely become abusive and problematic to others. There’s a very delicate balance here. What are we responsible for, and what are we not? There are no tidy answers, but a lot of important questions to ask.
It flows both ways – because we are affected by others, and affecting others all the time. We experience, and we react, and to some degree that reaction is a choice. If something causes us to be angry, then we may say ‘this makes me angry’. If something hurts us, ‘this makes me upset.’…
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